Joe - profile image
Joe
@JoeSalter89
yelling nonsense at all my robot advertising followers then crying myself to sleep. #SaintsFC hairdresser to the stars, entrepreneur, model, liar.
Followers: 266
Following: 179
Total tweets sent: 5843
Member since: Sun 11 Sep 2011


Joe Latest Tweets

Interviewer: "you've come from a sales background but where do you see yourself in 5 years time?" Interviewee: "we… https://t.co/Y7cwBUmuwB
Sun 22 Apr 21:33
2018
The royals think they're so great, but just remember, they have those painful pisses where blood comes out every mo… https://t.co/MMDpV6nTWm
Sun 22 Apr 19:32
2018
The longer this year's gone on, the less time I've managed to find to devote to derring-do.
Sun 22 Apr 19:18
2018
@richardogrady85 Of what? Was there some sort of competition on today? I didn't see one...
Sun 22 Apr 18:06
2018
Commentator: "Arnautovic is the leading goalscorer with nein." No wonder West Ham are struggling. #ARSWHU
Sun 22 Apr 14:09
2018
I'd like to ring a clown and book him in for a "birthday party". Then when he turns up it's someone's 40th and he d… https://t.co/2wo5DruDGq
Sun 22 Apr 14:05
2018
@simgeo35 I just don't like the "serious man" chefs. Marcus Wareing is the worst. He cooks a flan then acts all ste… https://t.co/tyt54HJylO
Sun 22 Apr 13:37
2018
@simgeo35 HFW is like that. Why does he care SO much that we eat more celeriac?
Sun 22 Apr 13:31
2018
@simgeo35 All you need this week is to dust off your smelter, gather your bronze ingots and your hadron collider an… https://t.co/R3P1hpbgg0
Sun 22 Apr 13:26
2018
@simgeo35 He showed us how to make a hog roast oven the other week out of things we have lyig around. Like steel fr… https://t.co/xoso4ffsuJ
Sun 22 Apr 13:24
2018
People think that the #LondonMarathon is 26.2 miles, but it's a conspiracy! They run it in about 2 hours 20. I ran… https://t.co/jtROOD2HWD
Sun 22 Apr 11:34
2018
@MattyEarle A very pleasant, middle-class, 58 year-old Methodist woman, from The Cotswolds (is the full answer).
Sun 22 Apr 09:41
2018
Me and the boy. https://t.co/DVghakIRto
Sat 21 Apr 13:58
2018
Hey, tell me your mother's maiden name and your first pet and that's your porn star name! Also tell me your pin nu… https://t.co/cf3cMDwuXU
Fri 20 Apr 13:53
2018
@richardogrady85 https://t.co/eYUvM0JB27
Fri 20 Apr 13:43
2018
It's that time of year again! When I pour myself a pint of Benedictine, write an anonymous hate-letter to Tony Robi… https://t.co/t1vrUZf8oF
Fri 20 Apr 13:25
2018
A picture of me back in 2010 meeting '90s R&B legend, Bobby Brown. Was a great day, he was very welcoming and I was… https://t.co/O7sUAJSdCt
Thu 19 Apr 16:18
2018
@AdamMcKola @john_17jackson International superstar soccer had the best (because it was the worst) commentary. 'Go… https://t.co/2appVswp0e
Thu 19 Apr 15:27
2018
@Muscleswhelan Um.. excuse me?? I actually happen to identify as a train, you bigot.
Thu 19 Apr 15:12
2018
@john_17jackson Fellaini and Darmian are gonners ain't they? Shaw surely too.
Thu 19 Apr 08:50
2018
@john_17jackson He's a goal machine.
Wed 18 Apr 20:22
2018
My favourite Tony Benn quote: "It would give me a terrific sense of satisfaction to be the man who sends Chris Euba… https://t.co/ofSlOMoXfb
Wed 18 Apr 20:16
2018
@john_17jackson Haha what a guy.
Wed 18 Apr 19:47
2018
@john_17jackson The guy was meant to end up world class. When was the last anyone even heard of him.
Wed 18 Apr 19:34
2018
@john_17jackson You miss Macheda
Wed 18 Apr 19:32
2018
@john_17jackson Same with Smalling? And Schneiderlin?
Wed 18 Apr 19:30
2018
@john_17jackson Remember when you bought him from us for £30m and I said he was nowhere near good enough for you and you laughed at me?
Wed 18 Apr 19:30
2018
An English woman I work with, in her late 50s, has never heard of writing 'BOOBS' on a calculator. Must be the only person in the country.
Wed 18 Apr 15:06
2018
@simgeo35 Chew your food, drive safely, take care of yourself etc. If it weren't for nans we'd have failed as a species millennia ago.
Wed 18 Apr 09:46
2018
One of the silliest phrases I have heard in recent years (repeatedly) is, "staying hydrated is important to me".
Wed 18 Apr 07:04
2018
@richardogrady85 Oh that's good For a minute there I thought I'd lost you.
Tue 17 Apr 20:59
2018
@richardogrady85 Must not be getting my messages...
Tue 17 Apr 19:05
2018
@richardogrady85 Rich?
Tue 17 Apr 18:11
2018
@richardogrady85 So far as sweetcorn goes, I don't have brand preference. Supermarket's own is fine. Before you say… https://t.co/Jyt46h3slw
Tue 17 Apr 12:57
2018
@richardogrady85 just so you know,.it's Birdseye if you're asking about my favourite brand of frozen pea. Thanks.
Tue 17 Apr 08:28
2018
The two things I miss most about the '90s are: 1) being able to tell people who are being "square" to "loosen up,… https://t.co/UWL9Wcnk19
Mon 16 Apr 20:15
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow Hope so. Just seems a shame with how far we came. One bad manager and everything ruined.
Sun 15 Apr 14:22
2018
Seeing lots of tweets looking for positives in relegation. There're none. We'd struggle to get up again, if we do a… https://t.co/Z51Q7HtBot
Sun 15 Apr 13:39
2018
Jonjo Shelvey has got to be one of the players of the season. #NEWARS
Sun 15 Apr 13:35
2018
If someone asked me to do an impression of a model train enthusiast, it would be this guy. #SundayBrunch https://t.co/Uar6CbhW4R
Sun 15 Apr 10:22
2018
@westy3566 I saw a man be sick in his pints in the Savoy weatherspoons in Swindon centre and the shiftily look arou… https://t.co/1gL5I57p1i
Sat 14 Apr 14:28
2018
Is there any reason Gregg Wallace is dressed as a Beatrix Potter, aristocratic, anthropomorphic mole? #Masterchef https://t.co/7lVrt6mgEr
Fri 13 Apr 21:07
2018
Made me chuckle. https://t.co/zcjfuOhxce
Fri 13 Apr 14:30
2018
@philextence How have you got time to post this when you should be chock-a-block busy sinking Portuguese beer? 🍺
Thu 12 Apr 14:01
2018
@PJKeay Bianca Gascoigne? ;)
Wed 11 Apr 21:55
2018
#Masterchef I got a voucher to go to Rick Stein's place in Marlborough for my birthday. If he serves me fish heads… https://t.co/nfEZ8Z5HDD
Wed 11 Apr 20:36
2018
@adamhess1 She's not only beautiful, but believable. Keeper.
Wed 11 Apr 20:08
2018
#Masterchef Micky Flanagan's let himself go. https://t.co/wUzPSW5uhL
Wed 11 Apr 20:05
2018
I'm worried about the state of youth violence. When I was a kid, it rarely went further than someone yelling "YOU G… https://t.co/oBkBAmDo9n
Wed 11 Apr 18:44
2018
I like how the phrase "on the morrow" has gone from 18th century, to gangsta with kids. "Never the twain shall meet… https://t.co/UgtHAjhJYk
Wed 11 Apr 16:34
2018
If there's one thing that brings a community together it's when they live on a one-way street and someone drives do… https://t.co/ns75tx4s5l
Wed 11 Apr 15:18
2018
@copymama @Helenreade5
Wed 11 Apr 13:55
2018
@simgeo35 Although HFW is a favourite celebrity chef of mine. He says you should respect produce and animals, then… https://t.co/wcFzL7vRC0
Tue 10 Apr 16:14
2018
@DaftLimmy Anything by those lovely boys of Wet Wet Wet.
Tue 10 Apr 15:36
2018
@SouthCoastRed @SimonCWNotNZnow Not now it's called ROYAL Wootton Bassett. They're a cut above. All of a sudden it'… https://t.co/PGe71D66U0
Tue 10 Apr 07:37
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow I wasn't expecting this hatred of moist to have travelled so far. NZ is impressive. I've heard at… https://t.co/ePL1vWBVj3
Mon 9 Apr 20:58
2018
Is this a local thing (Swindon for me) or have LOADS of people started purporting to hate the words "moist" and "gusset"?
Mon 9 Apr 20:40
2018
The only thing my son is learning from Peppa Pig is that dads are fat, incompetent morons. Bit close to the bone... #PeppaPig
Mon 9 Apr 17:50
2018
Say, on average, you start working at 20 and die at 80. That means you only get 3,120 weekends in your adult life,… https://t.co/8hiUT7O4xh
Sun 8 Apr 20:25
2018
@richardogrady85 Die.
Sun 8 Apr 15:58
2018
Cedric sending a message out to Messi again. #SaintsFC
Sun 8 Apr 15:46
2018
GET IN, SHLONG! #saintsFC
Sun 8 Apr 14:32
2018
I know it's said all the time but you could hear a pin drop at The Emirates. #ARSSOU
Sun 8 Apr 14:32
2018
@MattyEarle No. Odd to say as it's early and nothing has happened yet but the defence looks a bit confused. No line… https://t.co/JrcVcVFO1o
Sun 8 Apr 14:21
2018
Bit of an odd starting XI. I'd have started Romeu all day against Arsenal, so glad about that. Tadic no way. Austin… https://t.co/01nsKchmA9
Sun 8 Apr 14:11
2018
#LawroFacts Mark Lawrenson can't get in the bath because his skin is so absorbant that he balloons to twice his size.
Sat 7 Apr 08:17
2018
@john_17jackson https://t.co/jOGu82DUkg
Fri 6 Apr 16:26
2018
Mark Lawrenson had one of the walls of his house replaced with a state of the art aquarium, then had it filled with… https://t.co/Dp8xWB4GfG
Fri 6 Apr 10:57
2018
Mark Lawrenson is currently saving up for a manatee.
Fri 6 Apr 10:53
2018
@philextence I suppose this while cash for gold movement suits pirates.
Fri 6 Apr 08:08
2018
Imagine how mental you'd have to be to try a bicycle kick if there was no ball. Your body wouldn't let you do it. L… https://t.co/vvLK3sXihH
Thu 5 Apr 21:18
2018
@stfc_mick You just can't beat parrot people. You know if someone has a parrot, he's going to be a geeza. If he tak… https://t.co/q80O1ijJPz
Thu 5 Apr 12:25
2018
The absolute hero who walks around #Swindon with a parrot is back. If anyone knows who this is, shake his hand and… https://t.co/46zXeE8OiA
Thu 5 Apr 12:12
2018
@SouthCoastRed The woman is a TOILET.
Wed 4 Apr 20:56
2018
@richardogrady85 He'd never have done that for us either because we are essentially in the Championship.
Wed 4 Apr 20:14
2018
I might start a LinkedIn profile and only follow people with cock in their surname (Woodcock, Pocock, Cockhead, Coc… https://t.co/mF1yPmjXLO
Wed 4 Apr 16:47
2018
Right everyone. I'm calling time on his. Settle down. Thats enough zombie and superhero stuff, we're not 6 anymore.… https://t.co/eo3u8n40u9
Wed 4 Apr 16:38
2018
@simgeo35 Few ideas: Ultimate Frisbee; flashing; tiger balm; Gregg Wallace and all he represents; redo your year 6… https://t.co/HrEWq7Je5F
Wed 4 Apr 13:09
2018
@simgeo35 let me know your thoughts if you get round to watching it. an odd watch.
Wed 4 Apr 00:12
2018
@simgeo35 it's funny you should say that. one of the oddest documentaries I ever saw was this.… https://t.co/CxOg0I7Umo
Wed 4 Apr 00:06
2018
@simgeo35 eeeeeh remember the harrowing of t'North? that Conqueror! piss on my jeans!
Tue 3 Apr 23:57
2018
@simgeo35 DOES ANYONE REMEMBER ROAST DINNERS? WHARRABOUT SEATS?
Tue 3 Apr 23:54
2018
@simgeo35 Golazzo was very '90s. I'm surprised Peter Kay never mentioned it.
Tue 3 Apr 23:51
2018
@simgeo35 a rush and a push and golazzo, '90s football is ours.
Tue 3 Apr 23:48
2018
The hardest thing to write on a phone with autocorrect is "David De Gea"
Mon 2 Apr 11:55
2018
@simgeo35 I was thinking exactly the same thing. But then I should imagine most of us were. My excuse is that I was… https://t.co/ALKmhXMKy5
Sun 1 Apr 18:56
2018
@john_17jackson In Jeff we trust.
Sun 1 Apr 18:17
2018
I'm glad someone published the April Fools Day rules. I'm all for fun but it has to be regulated fun, approved by t… https://t.co/7C61SH8SgL
Sun 1 Apr 18:07
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow You can probably get an Ant McPartlin autobiography from a book pulping factory.
Sun 1 Apr 17:58
2018
Boy meets chicken. https://t.co/kBUl27PMsn
Sun 1 Apr 17:25
2018
@richardogrady85 I had that as a Stoke win. Arsenal just cost me £160.
Sun 1 Apr 15:58
2018
Sat 31 Mar 17:13
2018
@MattyEarle Take this seriously, I have a feeling you're making comedy guesses and if you are I'll be very disappointed.
Sat 31 Mar 17:11
2018
@MattyEarle SO close!
Sat 31 Mar 16:31
2018
Bit of light relief from this #SaintsFC horror show. What kids programme was this? https://t.co/EJfdwcyS1M
Sat 31 Mar 16:16
2018
Looking at the team I don't even know what MH could change at 1/2 time to improve. JWP on to get some passes going?… https://t.co/0NDYMe6Y3z
Sat 31 Mar 15:46
2018
Charlie Austin hat trick it is then. #SaintsFC
Sat 31 Mar 15:24
2018
Christ... #SaintsFC
Sat 31 Mar 15:18
2018
@CReid1989 @SouthCoastRed Was just a pointless, negative and wrong tweet. Talent shows at any level. Berbatov smoke… https://t.co/2iVjrv0d1X
Sat 31 Mar 13:38
2018
@simgeo35 I like the youngish, Irish, Donald-ish fella, Donal Skehan. He always seems like he's in a job interview.… https://t.co/W7m8zPilsz
Sat 31 Mar 13:13
2018
@simgeo35 I HATE the omelette challenge. There's nothing more tedious. The "banter" they have makes my face hurt. "… https://t.co/K4bH40ZVno
Sat 31 Mar 12:39
2018
@SouthCoastRed @CReid1989 Unbelievable isn't it. Basically the criticism of Matt Le Tissier is that he wasn't born in a different year.
Sat 31 Mar 12:11
2018
@CReid1989 Well that showed me.
Sat 31 Mar 10:02
2018
@simgeo35 Obscure*. Often the sites are not secure.
Sat 31 Mar 08:58
2018
@simgeo35 Of course! Sometimes I also use it to read an o secure Wikipedia article so I can go to the pub and prete… https://t.co/sLD3A0Z0vV
Sat 31 Mar 08:58
2018
@simgeo35 I wrote it then realised there was a good chance loads of Liverpool fans would 'troll' me. I didn't (and… https://t.co/6VmZARLVhw
Sat 31 Mar 08:54
2018
@CReid1989 Just got to look at stats and goal reels on YouTube. Le Tiss was pure class. Up there with Gazza and Sch… https://t.co/8FOMujg6eA
Sat 31 Mar 08:46
2018
Make or break today, #SaintsFC! Squeaky bum time.
Sat 31 Mar 07:55
2018
Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink has had an amazing career, scoring 206 professional goals, representing his country and hav… https://t.co/beZFWToYJy
Fri 30 Mar 19:34
2018
Everyone seems to speak like this now, so let's give it a go. So... Wow guys... guys... just WOW. Thank you all fo… https://t.co/bWfFw8vRh0
Fri 30 Mar 10:33
2018
@sherdog91 Any highway activity?
Fri 30 Mar 08:17
2018
Passed this chunky monkey. #R01 Now need a #SaintsFC victory to top off the perfect #EasterWeekend https://t.co/LQQWTp7sQy
Thu 29 Mar 19:26
2018
Worst injury I ever got playing football was when, on an ice-cold day, someone toe-punted a rock-hard ball from poi… https://t.co/8z0uJZtU4z
Thu 29 Mar 18:17
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow Thank you too!
Thu 29 Mar 15:15
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow @TomPettinger This machine is essentially like a giant steamer. It steams the potatoes befor- A G… https://t.co/n5NQbO1rg7
Thu 29 Mar 13:54
2018
Got sent a game sent to us from @Paymentshield. Who said financial services isn't fun? Can't wait to try and prono… https://t.co/uF7r92N9yH
Thu 29 Mar 10:37
2018
@SimonCWNotNZnow @RealBobMortimer Someone commissioned the pitch : "Let's have Gregg Wallace enthusiastically walki… https://t.co/m2QBIH7LPD
Wed 28 Mar 21:54
2018
@SouthCoastRed @Just_Mahmoud_ @SAINTSINFRANCE Souness gets grief for that signing, but it was a punt. Gateshead saw… https://t.co/c7GIh87jMw
Wed 28 Mar 19:20
2018
@Just_Mahmoud_ @SAINTSINFRANCE Where's Guly?
Wed 28 Mar 19:07
2018
#TheChase isn't the same without @anne_hegerty.
Wed 28 Mar 17:37
2018
@westy3566 At least you can't be a murderer, then. According to their neighbours they always kept themselves to the… https://t.co/lyrGS5yGGi
Wed 28 Mar 17:35
2018
*Ring ring* Alan Hanson: Hello? Lawro: Hanson.. Hanson.. I think there's a bomb in my shed. Hanson: Why dya thin… https://t.co/0CecEqLyOB
Wed 28 Mar 15:06
2018
@john_17jackson Why has that brand of pancake mix got the WWF logo?
Tue 27 Mar 20:35
2018
@john_17jackson I know he isn't in the squad. He's here in my pancake mix packet.
Tue 27 Mar 20:32
2018
@john_17jackson I've got that pancake mix ready. 🥞
Tue 27 Mar 20:28
2018
@RenuAmeNaggayar Thank you. My headache has gone.
Mon 26 Mar 19:04
2018
@londonlass666 Specific one: People who take a bite of cake, so it coats the roof of their mouth etc. and before fi… https://t.co/D61deFACnC
Mon 26 Mar 08:15
2018
@saintbannerman Waterboarding is an option...
Sun 25 Mar 20:17
2018
Staggeringly, my son is now 4 months old and in his entire lifetime as a mini #SaintsFC fan, we've only won one lea… https://t.co/JOh3j0zrRG
Sun 25 Mar 19:27
2018
@sherdog91 That's some extreme daddery mate.
Sun 25 Mar 18:35
2018
To all the dads all over the country, Spring is coming. We will soon be able to turn our heating off!
Sun 25 Mar 17:57
2018
Flicking through the channels and stopped on #TheVoice for a moment. A woman (contestant I assume) said, "If Olly [… https://t.co/jJdt9dkFrI
Sun 25 Mar 14:47
2018
Lawro, smiling in front of of a post-apocalyptic London. When all comes to an end, there will be only cockroaches… https://t.co/z6C3jyeSBh
Sun 25 Mar 13:43
2018
Nothing against the bloke but whose idea was it to have Dion Dublin on #HomesUnderTheHammer? Did he approach them o… https://t.co/XReYCaoKAU
Sun 25 Mar 12:24
2018
#TheBigQuestion lineup is always: Posh, nasty right wing man; Liberal woman with nose piercing; Angry Muslim wom… https://t.co/r0vMPZFoFz
Sun 25 Mar 11:02
2018
Sun 25 Mar 09:45
2018
When our baby has a stuffy nose, the misses sucks it out with her MOUTH. I hope to god he doesn't get constipated...
Sat 24 Mar 17:42
2018
#FootballFocus advantage over #SoccerSaturday is that it has Lawro. Without him it's dull. With Lawro it has a stra… https://t.co/PcwrDzBAQk
Sat 24 Mar 12:05
2018
@john_17jackson Course it is. England don't score very often.
Sat 24 Mar 12:00
2018
Every time England score, I fish around in my little bum bag and award myself a walnut.
Sat 24 Mar 11:43
2018
Hey I've just met you. And this is crazy. But you look like my dead mother. Can I skin you, maybe?
Sat 24 Mar 11:17
2018
@MattyEarle I never quite thought football was the same since Yugoslavia was disbanded.
Fri 23 Mar 07:58
2018
Has anyone got a fake 1994 Barcelona shirt, bought from a Spanish dodgy market, with Romario on the back? I want to… https://t.co/XCKb7p2kiz
Fri 23 Mar 07:15
2018
When Monty Don was a child he'd have been titled "Master Don". https://t.co/Ycsc1ascFS
Fri 23 Mar 00:38
2018
@simgeo35 I'd prefer her to marinade you.
Thu 22 Mar 21:05
2018
@SouthCoastRed Darren Bullock didn't just kick people like Beacham, GBH comes to mind. Karl Robinson looks like a… https://t.co/GiBDT3QyAf
Thu 22 Mar 18:50
2018
@SouthCoastRed Reminds me of when Joey Beacham left Swindon for Oxford. I still have an effigy of him hanging from… https://t.co/P6SZ6dYh7o
Thu 22 Mar 18:41
2018
The street outside my work stinks of weed. I bet it's putting the guys in the Carribbean restaurant nextdoor off their food.
Thu 22 Mar 13:56
2018
What I neglected to mention is that it didn't come off as easily as I had forseen (ironic being an all seeing eye o… https://t.co/lDLYlNJbbP
Thu 22 Mar 09:34
2018
@simgeo35 It's called "weight watchers, watchers". I watch the weight watchers and think if I did that I would die.
Thu 22 Mar 08:35
2018
The boy has reached the stage of enlightenment where he's earned his all-seeing third eye. #Buddha https://t.co/h7eiih3qfR
Thu 22 Mar 08:35
2018
I think I've got to the point where I'm so unfit, to try and get fit would damage me. A light jog could cause a stroke.
Thu 22 Mar 08:33
2018
@simgeo35 The leaves appeal to the middle-classes because they remind them (subliminally) of Cernunnos and the leaf… https://t.co/KTcUDb2we0
Wed 21 Mar 16:45
2018
@simgeo35 The humble mandarin.
Wed 21 Mar 16:39
2018
@simgeo35 There has been a change in sub-orange choice and variety throughout time. It used to be all oranges, then… https://t.co/dAA3H1G1c2
Wed 21 Mar 16:38
2018
This was on my living room wall. #RainbowTree #AUnicornDidIt https://t.co/rPmxrubesD
Wed 21 Mar 16:29
2018
@simgeo35 When I were young, we had nothing. Absolutely nothing. Apart from mountains and mountains of food, the on… https://t.co/mFimrnnA2P
Wed 21 Mar 08:23
2018
@simgeo35 He'd struggle with tapas. Portion size isn't big enough. And we know it's a tough northern thing to... ea… https://t.co/4duMTEm1c3
Wed 21 Mar 08:08
2018
When will Gillette admit that they can no longer improve on the razor. 5, 6, 20 blades doesn't make a difference. I… https://t.co/v552VM143G
Tue 20 Mar 17:59
2018
@AvivaUKSupport All sorted, thanks.
Tue 20 Mar 12:32
2018
@AvivaUKSupport An hour and still going strong. It's ok though, I'm having a rave to Gabriella Cilmi - Sweet About… https://t.co/GYN7WkCeYa
Tue 20 Mar 12:10
2018
Been on hold to AVIVA for the last half hour. They've played Kylie and Beyonce as the hold music. When I finally ge… https://t.co/68Q7ELFRTw
Tue 20 Mar 11:43
2018
@Hartlisa100 We did that. Said no contracts or obligations. Got no signal on the mobile phone so switched that alon… https://t.co/J3iIL0oW0X
Tue 20 Mar 11:30
2018
@simgeo35 Your sense of humour has really taken a Plungé. (I had to Google Lithuanian cities and that's the only on… https://t.co/GZOQ4IicfZ
Mon 19 Mar 16:33
2018
Just saw Anne Frank's Diary in the Fiction section of Waterstones. Didn't realise they were Holocaust deniers.
Mon 19 Mar 12:42
2018
When I have a free weekend next, I'm going to go to Cotswold Wildlife Park to call the ostrich a wanker. Because th… https://t.co/D0GbJEh4tX
Sun 18 Mar 18:10
2018
Can somebody pass the message on to footballers that this celebration is really, really annoying? https://t.co/ZJsAg5mMum
Sun 18 Mar 18:04
2018
What a fee-llliii-in! When Ted Danson's on the ceiling! https://t.co/SehGPBlERX
Sun 18 Mar 16:48
2018
@simgeo35 Jesus was 4 days before me. I'm 29th. We often hire a sports hall and share a party though.
Sun 18 Mar 16:46
2018
@simgeo35 Ted Danson, Martin Offiah and Aled Jones for me. We're all Capricorns. I'm not sure that we all have a lot in common.
Sun 18 Mar 16:41
2018
@simgeo35 You should really embrace change. Start a new career. I see a new friendship forming for you that you don't expect.
Sun 18 Mar 16:11
2018
@simgeo35 Typical Cancer... ♋
Sun 18 Mar 16:07
2018
@john_17jackson And he's got us into the FA Cup final.
Sun 18 Mar 15:22
2018
@ObscureThing77 Channeling Thierry Henry.
Sun 18 Mar 15:21
2018
I never doubted Cedric for a second. Always knew he'd score the winner. https://t.co/JlfJyr5FiE
Sun 18 Mar 15:20
2018
@john_17jackson Saints have got this cup in the bag.
Sun 18 Mar 15:18
2018
I never doubted Sparky for a second. https://t.co/lc8fZANjS6
Sun 18 Mar 15:17
2018
@simgeo35 I'd take him to be honest.
Sun 18 Mar 15:06
2018
Remember when we were admired for being a creative, passing, attacking team? Apart from McCarthy , Bertrand and arg… https://t.co/KJdD3MH5Fj
Sun 18 Mar 14:14
2018
This isn't much different to Newcastle. All the possession but don't look for a second like mounting any serious attacks. #SaintsFC
Sun 18 Mar 14:05
2018
Fuck it, bring on Tadanari Lee and Guly. #SaintsFC
Sun 18 Mar 13:58
2018
Cedric's crossing, passing and possession keeping have been piss poor so far. Passenger. #SaintsFC #facup
Sun 18 Mar 13:48
2018
@westy3566 I panicked and bought 40 packs of breast pads and a tinned pie.
Sun 18 Mar 12:34
2018
"Hello is that my local fish and chip shop?" "Who are you?" "Mark Lawrenson. Are you local to me?" "I think so,… https://t.co/NzY2USTtnI
Sun 18 Mar 10:33
2018
Mark Lawrenson was born with an udder.
Sun 18 Mar 10:30
2018
@richardogrady85 You think that's bad? Word is that plot 3A (Dennis) has taken such a frost-battering that his enti… https://t.co/JtSvW9VIv3
Sun 18 Mar 10:25
2018
The #BeastFromTheEast2 hits the West Country. The allotment is in turmoil. Old Ken has lost his bean crop and my he… https://t.co/VlsUxuQh1p
Sun 18 Mar 09:38
2018
@simgeo35 @ijbrads66 Salisbury in this climate. Siberian.
Sun 18 Mar 01:11
2018
@john_17jackson Surely you know that? 28th March 2010 should be a date engraved on all football fans minds. 4-1 Sai… https://t.co/6pCEf66wpd
Sat 17 Mar 14:59
2018
@john_17jackson Have you got the Johnstone's Paint Trophy in your cabinet though? No and you NEVER will.
Sat 17 Mar 14:54
2018